Saturday, April 25, 2015

1 Month Surgiversary (Surgery-Anniversary)

I can't believe it's already been a month since my bypass surgery. I've lost so much weight already (38.7lbs)! I can't believe it! I feel pretty good considering that I also had the hiatial hernia repair & some bleeding during surgery, but more about that later.

I can see the difference in my face. My clothes show the difference too! Clothes that fit before surgery are baggy on me now. On top of that clothes that were too tight before surgery are starting to fit nicely again, and some are even getting slightly lose.

My energy level has gone up quite a bit. I can go for walks without getting tired without getting tired, sore, or out of breath far more easily than I use to be able to. Yesterday I walked for over 2 miles around town with my BFF/God sister (Krysti).

I feel better in general and I'm loving it. There is one strange thing though. I'm starting to hate food. I don't really even want to put it in my mouth, because from my mouth it goes into my pouch and I don't really like how food feels to me in there.

My mother and Krysti don't seem to be experiencing this. Although this is sort of helpful for me because I've always liked food too much. Mostly I don't really wanna eat anything I mean I'm just not hungry, ever. I get thirsty just not hungry. Which is also good in a way because I was always hungry pre-op. Good but unexpected.

Monday, April 6, 2015

Trying a new food, with a new tummy.

Today I got to start part 2 of stage 2 of my bariatric post-op diet. And I got to try yogurt and pudding!

I mean separately I didn't mix them together or anything. I just finished half of a Yoplait strawberry cheesecake Greek yogurt whips. It was so great! Very smooth, subtle and not too strong of a flavor. Which is best for me, wicked strong flavors have been making me feel sick since surgery. Sometimes even just smelling very strong flavors makes me nauseous too.

The sugar free pudding also went down nicely.

Sorry I took so long to post this I've had a lot going on. But I did write it for my 1week anniversary

Mom's Surgery

So today my mother had her gastric bypass surgery. It was very difficult letting her go into surgery but she did great! The surgery went perfectly, and she is in her room now. The anesthesia hasn't worn off quite yet, she keeps falling asleep. It will be so weird to drive home later without her. I'm not use to her not being home.

Honest Confession: She has been asleep so long that part of me wants to head out now and do the rest of what Krysti and myself need to do today. But we still need to wait for her to be moved to her permanent single room. So we aren't leaving until then at least.

Friday, April 3, 2015

Addictions: Food

Addiction: using a substance to change mood, uncontrollably. Or relying on a substance to "feel" good. Using a substance for psychological comfort.

So when you boil it down the reason I needed to have this surgery, in fact the most basic reason that most people need weight loss surgery, is food addiction. I have struggled with this as far back as I can remember. I even struggled with food addiction for years before I began to gain weight and become obese from it.

Growing up I used food to comfort myself because of the trauma I was experiencing on a day to day basis. It was the only way my very young mind was able to cope with being raped on a daily basis by my own father. And I was far to young to understand the damage I was doing to myself by devouring food. All I knew was that it made me feel better. A weakness that I have lapsed back on several times in my life.

In a way food addiction I'd the worst addiction of all. We all require food to survive, therefore making it difficult for us to spot the problem when it is beginning. Other addictions are not things we absolutely need to survive. Food however we can't get away from we must eat to live.

On top of that our modern American society revolves around food. Most advertisements are for food, there are displays with junk food through out stores like Wal-Mart even when they already have a large grocery section like the one in my hometown does. Every corner you turn there are displays with candy, and other junk food.

Now I in no way expect the surgery to cure my addiction to food. However it is an incredible tool that I can use to help me get over my emotional relationship with food. I am basically never hungry now, and even when I am I can't fit very much food at all because of the size of my pouch. That will help with my problems as well as my food aggression. As they are my emotional links to food. There it's a lot of work for me to do myself but I already feel as though I'm making progress on this front.

To the Pain

Today is my 5th day since surgery! On my left side just underneath the bottom of my rib cage I have a different type of stitch.

After finishing my surgery My surgeon came out and told my family that I had a little bit of extra bleeding so he stitched it up. He also warned them that the area would be fairly painful for me, more painful than my other incisions. He probably mentioned it to me too when he came upstairs to check on me that night but I was a bit out of it and having a panic attack, so I only remember so much of the first night.

This stitch makes moving around a bit difficult. Where my other incisions are I barely feel any pain at all. But in the one with the stitch I feel quite the sting in the one spot when ever I move my abdominal muscles. The pain comes in varying amounts of course, depending on how strenuous the activity. When I try to get comfortable in my bed and roll from side to side I get quite a shock like being stabbed. The same happens when I try to sit up from a laying down position the pain is excruciating. If I went in to say everything that hurts that area I would write a book so I'll move on to the pain management.

When I first got home I tried to just use Tylenol instead of the Oxycodone I was prescribed. It didn't really work. I called the office and they said to try taking the Oxycodone and let then know if that didn't help or my pain got worse etc.

So that's what I'm trying now. I took one 5mg tablet and I'm laying down for now until I know how it affects me. Hopefully I don't need to bring the dose up to 2 tablets. (I am prescribed 1 to 2, 5mg tablets, every 4 hours)

***Now this post isn't meant to scare you it's just my personal experience. Not everyone even needs this type of stitch, and the pain is manageable. I am also not a medical professional, always contact your doctor/surgeon etc with medical concerns. This blog is a description of my personal journey.***

Below is a picture of the painful incision with the steri-strips covering it.

Thursday, April 2, 2015

Update from inside of the hospital

I had my surgery yesterday (Monday March 30, 2015) and I'm doing great so far.

I'm on stage one, clear liquids only. So far I've eaten sugar free popsicles, sugar free jello, propel water, and chicken broth.

I got my second tray just a few minutes ago it's all so much to get down. I didn't finish my other broth or my first water yet lol.I did manage to finish my jello & the popsicles I was given when I took my pain meds earlier.

This whole hospital stay hadn't been too bad so far.

I did have a panic attack & meltdown last night. I was in a double room which was extremely uncomfortable for me. And my heart rate was so high it was setting off warnings on the machines.

Once I realized what was happening and I told the staff they found me a single room as quickly as possible and gave me meds for my panic attack.

Now I'd like to explain a full on panic attack using my heart rate and hospital stay as a reference. As well as describing my reaction to events that may seem to others like not such a big deal:

First off all I was away from home, cut up, in pain, hooked up to machines, & my family had gone home. I have just gone through with a life changing decision. And to top it all off I was hungry and thirsty. Well with it being bypass surgery I was more hungry when I came in that morning but not so much after the surgery. Although I certainly was thirsty. (And due for my panic meds, which are only really for the amount of anxiety I have on a normal basis.) Another way to put that is even though I consciously knew and mass this decision willingly, my subconscious mind was trying to defend it's self and make sense of an attack. All while hoped up on pain killers.

So in my first room my roommate talked and grumbled in her sleep. Logically there shouldn't be anything frightening about that but it terrified me. I'd jump when she would start up or get louder. Basically every time she made a noise.

I know she couldn't help it, but that doesn't matter in a panic attack. All that mattered was that it frightened me.

There were also people that visited her that argued with her and were rude and mean. Also terrifying. They kept looking at me which also scared me. I think they scared me so much because I was completely defenseless aside from the call a nurse button by my side. Although the button wouldn't help me if I couldn't get to it.

 Now that is fear for someone with PTSD especially when it comes from being the victim of a crime in which you were defenseless, like a childhood rape survivor such as myself. (Maybe it's even terrifying for everyone, I wouldn't know like I said I'm a childhood rape survivor do that is the pov I have)

Most of what I'm trying to point out her it's that there are actual physical, measurable side affects to panic attacks. They are different than being nervous or a little scared. They are irrational, and 

Home from Surgery

I came home from surgery yesterday (April 1, 2015) and today is my first full day home. Here is how everything went.

The surgery itself went well, I had a bit of bleeding so I had to get an extra stitch in one of my incisions. That was a different type of stitch so it's more painful and sore that the other incisions.

When I was discharged from the recovery room and brought up to the ward I was going to stay in for the next few days I was surprised to see that I was being brought into a room that already had an occupant. This was quite frightening and then I saw my family in a room across the hall. I reached out towards them saying "but my family is over there". I remember being so confused and panicking a bit.

But then my family came into the room I was in, apparently they had been sitting in a waiting room.

Then they visited me for a while and everything I mentioned in my last post happened.

I'm not a big fan of narcotics so I haven't taken my Oxycodone since I got home. However one of my incisions ha another you of stitch in it and I am expected to have a lot more pain in that area. Which I definitely do. I'm going to have to call then if this keeps up to see what to do.

I'll talk more about my dislike of narcotics in my next post titled addictions.

Monday, March 30, 2015

Today is the day!!! Surgery surgery.

Today is surgery day. I'm going to leave home in a few minutes to make it to the hospital I'm having surgery at. I have to be there bright and early 6:15a.m. I can't believe it is today. These past few months have really flown by.

Wish me luck

Friday, March 27, 2015

I got the call for my surgery time.

The hospital called me yesterday to tell me what time to come in for surgery on Monday morning. Today is Friday March 27, 2015. Over the weekend I am on a liquid only diet. That is going to be weird. I'm already having difficulties digesting lactose I don't think I'll be able to continue to digest it properly when I'm not eating anything else. Maybe I should switch over to only the juice flavored protein drinks. I might do one more vanilla dark chocolate shake tonight to see how it goes down.

I'm other news I think I'll be posting a video once I get home from the hospital, or maybe before I go if I have time. I want this to be more off a vlog than just a written blog. We'll see what I can manage.

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Day 9 of 14 day Pre-Op Diet

I have already been through 9 days of the 14 day Pre-Op diet I'm so excited today I'm having "Pizza Chicken" for lunch. But the most exciting part is that I've already lost several pounds. The diet is no where near as difficult as I thought it would be.

My Daily Break Down:

  • Fruit flavored protein shake after I get up
  • High Protein low/zero Carb lunch with fruits and or veggies
  • Snack of fruit and/or protein 
  • Chocolate flavored protein shake
 I started this diet on Monday 3/16/2015 now its 3/24/2015 and I have already lost 8 lbs!!! That happened so quickly I can actually feel it. I can feel that my body is slightly smaller, just barely, but i can feel it when i am standing certain ways or move in a particular manner. I could get use to this...well i guess I'm going to have to, lol.

Thursday, March 19, 2015

10 days until Surgery!!!

I have been on my liquid diet for 4 days now (well this is the fourth day) and I only have 10 days left until surgery. I've already lost weight! I went from 323 to 317 since I last weighed myself. That's 6lbs down already! Woo-hoo!!! On the road to being healthy!

I can't believe how quickly the 6 months since I began this journey went by.  (actually 7 total, the nutrition program itself was 6 months)

I only have 10 days until surgery, I can't believe it.

**Also an update on Krysti, she came home Wednesday night and is doing fine. She had some trouble with the oxycodone in the hospital since its in the same drug family as codeine, which she is allergic to. But now that she isn't taking that anymore she is doing much better.

Monday, March 16, 2015

2 week Pre-Op diet

Today (Monday March 16, 2015) I started my 2 week pre-op diet. It is also the same day that my BFF/God Sister goes in for surgery.

I drank a syntrax nectar naturals peach flavored protein shake for breakfast this morning at about 5am. I drank it on the 45 minute drive to Emerson hospital from our house. Had 2 hard boiled eggs for a snack while we waited. (She was in surgery and recovery for a few hours and the café at the hospital doesn't have lunch this early)

Krysti did fine during surgery it was very routine. I'll get to go in to see her soon. It's 10:46 now and they said around 11. So very soon.

Went in to see her while she was still in the recovery room, she was very tired, but doing great! They give you little sponges on sticks to wet your mouth with since you can't drink until day 2 in the hospital.

Came home and ate 2 Atkins chicken broccoli Alfredo for lunch, yummo!

Had an orange for a snack later. And my dinner was a "Pure Protein" ready made chocolate shake. Not bad and helped me to curb my chocolate craving that was a little intense since my cycle just started. Although those shakes are a bit thicker than my fruit ones do that's a bit hard to get use to. I'm not the biggest fan of milk though do that's why the thickness is so strange for me.

Monday, March 9, 2015

So many medications and supplements, so little time.

Only 20 days left until surgery, and 1 week from today I start my pre-op diet. (The same day my God Sister goes in for surgery)

I have purchased just about everything I need to prepare. I still need a few key items that I found out about at my consent signing appointment today.

It's not like they piled on a whole new list of things I need. They are a few prescriptions some are for everyone, and one is tailored to me. That would be the liquid stool softener because of my hemorrhoid. And a prescription for lessening the risk of gallstones (if you don't have a gallbladder you don't need that one.). I also revived a perception for the pain medication I will need post-op, and an antacid to help the pouch heal faster.

I was also suggested to buy gas-x or another gas reliever. Because of the large amounts of gas pains commonly experienced after the roux-ny bypass surgery.

So in total that makes 4 prescription medications, 3 vitamin supplements, and a gas reliever. (Not including the psych medicine I already take.)

Below are pictures of the Vitamins I purchased and the sizes of each type of pill compared to a US penny. 

Bottles of the B-12, Multivitamin with iron, & Calcium Citrate. 

Multivitamin with iron
Calcium Citrate

Consent signing day!

Today is the day I sign my consent for surgery form! I'm sitting in one of the rooms now waiting for the PA/TA to come in to talk with me. This stuff is getting real!

I also just paid over half of the program fee today. The fee is $250, and I just paid $130 so I only have $120 left. I am seriously proud of myself for getting that much saved up.I saved $70 one month and $60 another. Honestly the extra $10 was a fluke.

My particular WLS program has a program fee, but that does not mean that every program has the same fee, or any fee at all. The fee that they charge at Emerson in concord MA covers many program benefits that insurance doesn't cover. Including seeing a nutritionist, and support group meetings.

***Ask your program about any fees, and if there are any payment plans available.***

Thursday, March 5, 2015

More gut problems; hemorrhoids

Ugg. It turns out I have even more gut problems than I thought. I had noticed a small amount of intestinal discomfort lately but I didn't see this coming.

***(I will be talking about some yucky stuff now so if you don't want to read about my hemorrhoid don't read this post, this is the only warning.)***

Over the last week or two I have had a tiny amount of blood appear on my toilet paper about half of the time I wiped my butt. My skin is so sensitive that in the freezing & dry New England winter I simply thought my anus was chapped. To try and heal it I put vitamin A&D on it.

I did that for about a week. And then Wednesday (yesterday) morning I was getting ready to go to work and there were a few drops of blood in the toilet after I urinated. I was a bit freaked out and I checked the internet to see what I should do. Ok not so much iattempted to find out what was wrong but mostly I was glad my mom happened to be up so she could help me figure this out.

After a bit I decided that I would do my bus monitor shift since it was only for the morning and would only take from 5:45am to 9:30/10:00am at the latest. I decided that I would call the doctor to set up an appointment when there were no kids on board since the driver that day was my god sister anyway so I didn't mind her knowing about my problem.

Unfortunately for me after I made a bowel movement a short while later the toilet was filled with blood. I freaked right out and had to call out of work then and there and take a trip to the ER.

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

I have hit a very unexpected turn; Digestive issues

I'm not sure if I've mentioned a lot about my bowel problems in here, but I think they are getting worse. 

I know I've mentioned having a hiatial hernia. Where the stomach pops up through the opening the esophagus comes down through in the diaphragm. (It's a lot like squeezing a water balloon through a circle made with your thumb and indexfinger.

This is a condition that I only found out I had because of the upper gi required by the surgical weight loss program I go to. And I am so so so thankful for it. When I have my rouny gastric bypass on March 30, 2015 my surgeon well tighten up my weak diaphragm muscle and repair my hernia! 

However recently I believe my hernia has been getting increasingly worse and my symptoms more noticeable, and painful. 

Saturday, February 28, 2015

30 days and counting

I'm now 30 days away from surgery. On Monday 3/2/2015 I will have my pre-surgery nutrition appointment. I still have a few items left to order mainly vitamins & protein drinks.
The day that my God Sister/BFF goes in for surgery marks my first day of protein liquid diet. 
The liquid diet lasts 2 weeks. (Here is it broken down accordion to my surgeons wishes)
For the first 12 days I will replace 2 out of 3 meals with protein shakes. I get to have one protein rich meal per day. And small protein filled snacks if I am physically hungry through out the day. The snacks must consist of 7-12grams of protein.
For the last 2 days or 48 hours I will only be consuming protein shakes (3 per day), and clear liquids. And beginning at midnight the day of surgery I am not allowed to eat or drink anything until after my surgery and once I am okay-ed to do so by the surgeon. Even then it will only be very small amounts.
On another note my God sister starts her liquid diet on Monday, and my mother begins hers the day I go in for surgery.
My family's gastric bypass surgery dates:
My God sister: Monday March 16
Myself: Monday March 30
My Mom: Monday April 13

Sunday, February 22, 2015

Pictures added: 35 days left, I'm in the home stretch!

There are only 35 days left until my surgery! I have purchased most of what I'll be needing for my stay in the hospital. Also I'm on track with the purchasing schedule I planned out for myself.

Here is what I have bought so far:

A large black Duffle bag, I didn't have a suitcase so I needed to purchase one.

A thin but cozy large blanket. I like to have my own blanket when staying in a new place. So I bought one that I could easily pack and I was comfortable with. 

Travel size items: deodorant, an empty squeeze bottle for body wash, mouthwash, toothpaste, toothbrush covers, q-tips, scented hand sanitizer.

Blender bottles, as mentioned in a previous post. (On top is a "GoStack", also made by blender bottle, for easy storage on the go)

A 4x a day medicine planner. This is an interesting one. The first planner I bought was way way way too small (although it was adorable) Now I have to buy a replacement one. But my God Sister purchased one that one of each of the celebrate pills fit into one compartment with room to spare.

It just so happens that was the first planner I had looked at. Initially I had decided not to get it so we wouldn't have the same planners, but after I had to return the other one, I decided to buy the one I was going to get before & I labeled mine so that they wouldn't get mixed up.

I was thinking about buying a toiletry bag but I decided to use the one I already have, because it's free, and I don't need to bring much anyway.

I know this is a little gross to some people but I will most likely not wash my hair while I'm in the hospital, but I'm bringing shampoo & conditioner anyway. Just in case I need to wash it. My reason is because I have curly hair and I will be straight ironing it for my stay, so that my hair doesn't get horribly tangled. straightening makes my hair a lot easier to manage since I won't want to be doing my normal complicated shower routine. In order to bathe I will simply put my hair up and wear a shower cap. Showers go a lot faster that way as well

Oh and did I mention my fancy thermos water bottle that has a lock and a counter on the top.

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Omfg nectar naturals are delightful

Whey protein taste testing update: Nectar Naturals

I tried on of the nectar naturals samples that my mom bought and omfg I actually like it!!! I tried the peach, it's delicious totally worth the extra money to buy the naturals!!! I can't stress how happy I am that I found a flavor I like that tastes like fruit.

I totally recommend this product, it's even a good looking color, unlike the apple that was electric green and reminded me of Slurm!

Another day another flavor

Today I'm going to try the strawberry kiwi syntrax nectar. I just finished shaking it up it foamed up a lot so I'm waiting for the foam to go down before I drink it. Geez I hope I like this one.

Yeah so I just took my first sip. I don't like it. In going to starve to death for at least 4 weeks. Dam my sensitive taste buds. I can always taste the whey protein no matter what.

However the taste was very faint, if your taste buds aren't as sensitive as mine you most likely won't even notice the taste.

I am afraid I may have to find a brand that is not nectar after all. I was hoping that nectar would work out because I'm a bit lactose intolerant, and I don't like the taste or exit off milk either. Well do far I think the pre made pure protein vanilla has been my favorite. Never would have seen that coming.

Monday, February 9, 2015

Hiatial Hernia

**warning this post has some descriptive content that may be upsetting to some people**

During my initial testing when entering the weight loss program at Emmerson Hospital in Concord MA I found out that I have a hiatial hernia. I found this out during an upper GI test, they have you drink barium and roll around on an x-ray table so they can see if there is anything wrong with your upper gastrointestinal tract, such as a hernia.

I didn't really know what that meant until tonight. But I found out I have been living with these symptoms for a few years now. Since long before my testing in August and September of 2014.

So upon doing some research on hiatial hernias I found out that they are likely the cause for my bloody stools. The dark blackish color in the stool comes from bleeding in the upper gastrointestinal tract which is most likely caused by my hernia.

Certain foods appear to be more likely than others to upset the hernia. Other foods are less likely to upset it.

Luckily for me when I have my bypass done the surgeon will also repair my hernia so I will no longer have to deal with this discomfort.

Disclaimer*** I am not a doctor, the contents of this blog are my personal experiences, and not medical advice. I am a bariatric patient and not a qualified professional. Always ask your doctor about concerns you have about your health.

Protein Shakes

I order a sample pack of syntrax nectar from a few days ago and it got here today!!! Along with the shake bottle I purchased. 📦

I received almost all of the flavors I requested. I asked for 2 packets of strawberry kiwi, 2 Apple, 2 fuzzy navel, 2 lemon tea, and 2 lemonade.  Sadly I did not receive the lemonade packets, instead I received pina coolada.🍓🍏🍊🍋☕🍋🍍🍌

I tried the apple one today.🍏 i like it better than the unjury strawberry I tried. But I just don't like protein shakes. I can't stand the smell, even when it's faint.

I honestly have no idea how I will cope with drinking these for at least 4 weeks, yuck! And the one I tried today tastes better than the last one I tried

Saturday, January 31, 2015

Trekking without a Car

So since around thanksgiving I haven't had a car. The only car my family had was wrecked because of the door being to heavy for the hinges. So now we have no car. Yuck!

If you have ever gone for a long time without a car you know how much this sucks. If not it's a lot harder than you can imagine. Before going through it myself I never could have fully realized how difficult it is to have no car. I am very lucky to live in between 2 large grocery stores because that makes getting what I need a lot easier. No long trips in a bus to get groceries

Even though I live in a small city, It is the main hub for the smaller cities and towns for quite a ways around us. Luckily I can take the bus to most places in town. But it still makes travel difficult and doing errands becomes an all day thing even to only go to 2 different stores, in different plaza's.

Fortunately mass health provides rides for members to get to their appointments. But you have to remember to call 3 days ahead and they can't come to get us to take us to concord until 10am and won't come pick it's up if we stay later than 2:30pm.

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

60 days left!!!

I am officially ¾ of the way through my pre-op waiting period that started the first day I went to an appointment at my WLS clinic. Out of 240 days from that first appointment to the date if my surgery I have made it through 180 days total and I only have 60 days left until my gastric bypass surgery!!!

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

So little time: My last visit with my nutritionist before my pre op appointment

A few days ago I saw my nutritionist for the last time before my pre-op appointment in March. We talked about the vitamins I will be taking for the rest of my life as well as the protein shakes I will need to take both before and after surgery.

And I found out a few interesting things about protein shakes. Firstly there are way more flavors than chocolate milk, strawberry milk, and vanilla milk. There are also lots of options for lactose intolerant people. Including flavors that do not taste like milk!!!

Personally I can't stand the taste of milk and the thickness of it, so finding out that there are protein supplement powders that taste like juice, and one that tastes like chicken broth, as well as an unflavored variety that can be put into other things is super exciting to me.

Syntrax nectar makes flavors that are specially made to taste like juice. As well as cookie and chocolate flavor

Injury has a powder that taste like chicken broth and one that taste like strawberry juice.

I received samples of both of those 2 unjury flavors as well as several samples of vitamins. I took pictures of my samples next to common items for a size comparison; quarter, penny, pens, & post-it notes.

All the samples

Chewable Vitamins in both soft chew and tablet chew varieties. Compared to a quarter and a penny.

Individual protein powder packets in chicken broth and strawberry sorbet. Compared to post-it notes, a quarter & a penny.

***On another note, 61 days left till my surgery!!!!!!!!!***

Friday, January 9, 2015

My jar project

Since my mother, my god sister, and myself are all having gastric bypass surgery in a few short months I decided to make us each something to help us in our journey.

I wrote many small note tags that ask questions fit the jar owner to answer about their decision to have weight loss surgery goals they have etc. This has been a really fun project and is good to look at in times of doubt.

Thursday, January 1, 2015

My New Years Resolution

Now that the new year is upon us I thought this was the perfect time to discuss my new years resolution for 2015.

For the first time in forever I am actually making a resolution that I'm sure I will be sticking too. Usually in the past when weight loss was my goal for the new year it has been unachievable. Not that I didn't try, because I certainly did, it has simply been out of my reach to lose the amount of weight I need to loose to be healthy. On top of that I live in one of the coldest parts of Massachusetts, which makes the time of year that I can exercise outdoors relatively short considering my need to cut my current weight by at least half in order to reach my goal weight. Most gym memberships are costly and even the college I attend does not offer a free membership to their gym upon enrollment.

Of course those are just a few factors that have made losing weight more difficult. There are so very many more.

This year is different, on March 30th  I'm getting gastric bypass surgery. So no matter what I will lose weight. And just as it starts to warm up in my corner of the world I will be gaining tons of energy from the bypass and should have already lost a bit of weight making exercising easier.

My surgery is in 87 days. I can't believe how far I have come in my journey, but I still have a long way to go!!!